Wednesday, March 12, 2008

In Treatment


I’m hooked on a new HBO series,
In Treatment
. The show, starring Gabriel Byrne, is about a psychologist and four of his patients . . . all of which are very different and have unique problems of their own. The cool part is that you also get to see Paul, the psychologist, in his own therapy treatments . . . so you learn what he REALLY thinks of the whackos he’s treating. It’s all very addicting, and I’m totally hooked.

I don’t know why, but shows like this intrigue me. It’s like I enjoy watching how messed up the lives of these (fictional) people can become. I think it’s interesting to see what people in therapy are going through . . . the analysis of their youth, the details of their lives. Call me psycho . . . or just a bit voyeuristic.

The show is quite a commitment – it’s on 5 times a week, 30 minutes per episode. That’s 2 ½ hours of TV therapy. I’ll admit . . . if I try to watch too many episodes at once (I have them in the TIVO and watch them at leisure), my mind might wander during the expansive dialogue or the long, dramatic pauses. But, overall, it’s worth the commitment. Did I mentioned I’m hooked on the show?

And, sadly, it makes me wish . . . at least a little bit . . . that I could be in therapy, too. How strange I am. I don’t wish I had the problems of Laura, Alex, Sophie, Jake & Amy, or Paul himself . . . but I do think it would be fantastic to talk to someone that is totally impartial and completely removed from my life. Someone who could help me understand my own tendencies, where they came from, and how they influence those around me. It would give me a lot of insight into what makes me ME. It could just give me a good glimpse of myself. My true self (on second thought, that could be scary!).

I actually went to therapy just a very few times in my early 20s . . . three times total, I think . . . when I was having some serious problems with my parents and a boyfriend. It when I was about 22 . . . probably the lowest time in my life, emotionally, and I’m pretty sure that I was clinically depressed. I hardly even remember the sessions . . . other than the doctor asking me if I would be open to taking medication (hence my thought that I was depressed) and talking with him about buying myself my own computer. What strange memories that I have of that time, I think.

My therapy now would be different . . . my relationship with Jim, my father, my friends. It would be more therapeutic for me now, because I don’t find myself at a crossroads grasping for answers, as I did 8 years ago. I’d just like to take a deeper look at myself. I would like to think it could maybe make me a better person.

But, instead, I’ll settle for my TV psychoanalyst, Paul, in his at-home office, treating some of the great actors HBO found for this show.

It probably won’t come back after the first season . . . it’s kind of a downer at times, and – like I said – a lot of TV to watch. I was lucky to hear that my other fav on HBO, Tell Me You Love Me IS coming back . . . both of these shows are so heavy and sad. What is it that draws me to this kind of drama?

Maybe a therapist could help me figure that out.

No comments: