Written about 3 1/2 weeks ago . . . and the last of the back-logged blogs . . .
I’m blogging right now, knowing that I have to wait to post this one. I’m just DYING to tell. I’m dying to bust out and scream that we are pregnant. I want to tell my blogger world what our plans are for Meg’s new bedroom and for New Baby’s nursery. I want you all to know that, yes, at 11 weeks I AM showing.
But, alas, I must wait until next week sometime – after the 12 week appointment and after I’ve posted the several blogs I’ve already written about this topic.
Not telling has been SO hard for me. As a matter of fact, I simply have not NOT told. Several of my closest friends know. I think we told about ½ a dozen people in the first week . . . way early, but OK with me. Those people who knew then were the people that I would most likely tell if I had had a second miscarriage. Telling EVERYONE with the summer pregnancy was certainly fun . . . but it became SO hard when we miscarried. I hated telling everyone about that – I think that was seriously one of the hardest parts of the whole experience. It was embarrassing, it was so personal and private, and I just wanted to crawl in a hole instead of send out a stupid email to tell the world, “Nope, Baby 2 didn’t make it.”
I said to Jim, “Next time, we aren’t telling ANYONE.” Well, kind of.
He’s been so much better about keeping our secret than I have. I think he’s told maybe 2 or 3 people, total. Not even HIS closest friends know. He is a GREAT secret-keeper. Got any news that you are dying to share, but you really shouldn’t? Tell Jim – he’s like a vault, I tell you.
I did tell some people with excitement . . . those I was really anxious to tell . . . and some I told more by accident, then hated myself for doing it. I don’t know if that even makes sense. After telling a couple of people, I thought, “UGH! Why did you do that??” and way back in my head a little voice said, “Now you have to tell THEM if things go wrong.”
But things did NOT go wrong. So, oh well. Those accidents know before my Grandma and any other members of our extended family. So what? That’s life.
I’ve kept this a secret for about 8 weeks now. And don’t tell me you didn’t already guess (unless I told you, of course). I know it’s been a little obvious. The topic of pregnancy and miscarriage have totally disappeared from the blog . . . I think I accidentally mentioned a doctor’s appointment once or twice . . . and I’ve been generally happy-go-lucky. Well, pat yourself on the back if you figured it out before I announced. You didn’t really solve that tough of a riddle, but you did do a good job of putting a few pieces together.
And now we can move on to other topics again. I promise this isn’t turning in to a blog about my pregnancy. We’ll still chat about events, Meg, photography, and books (should I ever actually read another one). I just ran a series of pregnancy blogs because that what I’ve written and saved over the past few months. “Back to our regularly scheduled programming,” as they say.
Thanks for reading, and thanks for your well-wishes. Here is to June 2008 (oh yeah, they moved my due date to June 28th, one week after Meg’s b-day) and to a happy and healthy New Baby.
I’m blogging right now, knowing that I have to wait to post this one. I’m just DYING to tell. I’m dying to bust out and scream that we are pregnant. I want to tell my blogger world what our plans are for Meg’s new bedroom and for New Baby’s nursery. I want you all to know that, yes, at 11 weeks I AM showing.
But, alas, I must wait until next week sometime – after the 12 week appointment and after I’ve posted the several blogs I’ve already written about this topic.
Not telling has been SO hard for me. As a matter of fact, I simply have not NOT told. Several of my closest friends know. I think we told about ½ a dozen people in the first week . . . way early, but OK with me. Those people who knew then were the people that I would most likely tell if I had had a second miscarriage. Telling EVERYONE with the summer pregnancy was certainly fun . . . but it became SO hard when we miscarried. I hated telling everyone about that – I think that was seriously one of the hardest parts of the whole experience. It was embarrassing, it was so personal and private, and I just wanted to crawl in a hole instead of send out a stupid email to tell the world, “Nope, Baby 2 didn’t make it.”
I said to Jim, “Next time, we aren’t telling ANYONE.” Well, kind of.
He’s been so much better about keeping our secret than I have. I think he’s told maybe 2 or 3 people, total. Not even HIS closest friends know. He is a GREAT secret-keeper. Got any news that you are dying to share, but you really shouldn’t? Tell Jim – he’s like a vault, I tell you.
I did tell some people with excitement . . . those I was really anxious to tell . . . and some I told more by accident, then hated myself for doing it. I don’t know if that even makes sense. After telling a couple of people, I thought, “UGH! Why did you do that??” and way back in my head a little voice said, “Now you have to tell THEM if things go wrong.”
But things did NOT go wrong. So, oh well. Those accidents know before my Grandma and any other members of our extended family. So what? That’s life.
I’ve kept this a secret for about 8 weeks now. And don’t tell me you didn’t already guess (unless I told you, of course). I know it’s been a little obvious. The topic of pregnancy and miscarriage have totally disappeared from the blog . . . I think I accidentally mentioned a doctor’s appointment once or twice . . . and I’ve been generally happy-go-lucky. Well, pat yourself on the back if you figured it out before I announced. You didn’t really solve that tough of a riddle, but you did do a good job of putting a few pieces together.
And now we can move on to other topics again. I promise this isn’t turning in to a blog about my pregnancy. We’ll still chat about events, Meg, photography, and books (should I ever actually read another one). I just ran a series of pregnancy blogs because that what I’ve written and saved over the past few months. “Back to our regularly scheduled programming,” as they say.
Thanks for reading, and thanks for your well-wishes. Here is to June 2008 (oh yeah, they moved my due date to June 28th, one week after Meg’s b-day) and to a happy and healthy New Baby.
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