When You Least Expect It

We are dealing with a true tragedy in our family right now . . .

Jim's wonderful grandfather, only 78 years old, died very unexpectedly yesterday afternoon as a result of a blood clot following a routine laser surgery to remove gallstones.

We got the call about 5pm yesterday afternoon. Jim's mom called once, laughing and giggling about how well the surgery had gone. Then a second, much more chaotic call came that there had been a 'code blue.' The final call was a devistated daughter, informing us that her father had passed away.

It's all so sudden, so tragic.

Gene and Dorothy (Jim's Grandfather and Grandmother) were literally packing their bags to come to see us next week. They were to drive here from thier home in Emmons, IA, to meet Kate and celebrate Meg's birthday with us. Gene was going to do odds jobs around our house and in our basement to help spruce the place up . . . he was a skilled craftsman and loved doing things like that. The plans were set. We couldn't wait to see them.

Life changes on a dime.

Jim grew up with this Grandpa, building and creating things in his workshop from the time he was a very little boy. The story is often told about how Grandpa gave Jim his OWN REAL tools at a very young age . . . probably even too young, but Grandpa didn't care. He loved to build with Jim. He loved to build, period . . . the cradle that Kate sleeps in each night was built for Jim by Grandpa Gene in 1978. It's an heirloom that we treasure. And for our girls, Grandpa made a beautiful toy box. He literally finished it the morning of the surgery (no, I'm not kidding about that). It waits proudly in the workshop in Iowa, longing to be filled with pink toys and many dolls . . . we will be so happy to have that in our home.

We just can't believe he's gone.

Jim and I were waiting all afternoon to hear how the surgery had gone. As I mentioned, it was nothing more than very routine, run-of-the-mill, laser surgery to zap a few gallstones that were troubling Gene. The worst case scenario, as was relayed to the family, was that the lasers would suffice and true knife-and-scalpel surgery would have to be done. That would require a 2 week recovery and would delay their visit to Marietta. But, as it turned out, the lasers worked great, and we were all excited to know that Grandpa was doing well.

The doctors are not 100% sure yet, but it appears that sometime just after the surgery, a blood clot formed and went to Gene's heart, causing a massive heart attack. It seems impossible. But it's not. He died in recovery, so quickly that we all were left in total shock.

I can't imagine what his wife, Grandma Dorothy, is going through today. I'm sure she is still in shock. I'm thinking of her and of Jim's mother non-stop today. I just can't imagine.

Jim is off to Iowa tomorrow to be with his family and help take care of their needs. He'll return at the end of the week. After much discussion and much crying over the decision we had to make, we decided that I will stay home with the girls. I won't travel to Iowa. It's just too much for Kate, being only 10 days old . . . and too much for me at 10 days post-pardum, too. Meg, Kate, and I are going to go stay with my parents for some of the week . . . and I think they are going to come up to our house and stay with us for a few days, as well.

I hate that I can't be with Jim . . . with his family . . . in this time when we all need each other. But, as parents, we had to do what is best and what is right for our children. That means I stay here and take care of them while Jim travels. I'll miss him, that is for sure. The girls will miss him, too.

So . . . I'm not sure how much I'll be blogging from Newnan, but I'll try.

Thanks for thinking of us. In spite of all the happiness that we've had at our house these past 2 weeks, this tragedy has hit us hard. We are working to understand it all and to make sure that everyone in the family is being taken care of.